U Joke

Nov 20, 2010 By Youngzine Members
Sri's picture

This is a growing collection of jokes submitted by Youngzine members, and one (updated daily) from kids around the world.

Do you know a good joke? Share it with everyone below! Also, feel free to comment on others' jokes!

Note: Please write it in your own words, rather than copy the text from somewhere.

Also, do not repeat jokes that have been said before. You can look back at all previous ones. New and different jokes keep it interesting for the readers!

 
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2,074 comments
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Average: 4.5 (39 votes)

Comments

sb2's picture
sb2 January 23, 2012 - 11:59am
What's black, white and red all over? A newspaper *red = read
AnikaP's picture
AnikaP January 30, 2012 - 2:33pm

so true!!!!!!!!!!!

asiainasia's picture
asiainasia January 26, 2012 - 3:04am

OMG This is soooo true!

katieb's picture
katieb February 10, 2012 - 2:17pm

:D

Kiwi_BJ's picture
Kiwi_BJ January 30, 2012 - 6:34pm

Great Joke!

sb2's picture
sb2 January 23, 2012 - 8:55am
Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Get it?
Kiwi_BJ's picture
Kiwi_BJ January 31, 2012 - 8:04pm
Haha, good one!
jessical's picture
jessical January 21, 2012 - 7:57pm

What goes up but never goes down?
Your age!!!!

What has a lot of keys but doesnt open anything?
A Piano!!!!

What has a river but, no water, a forest but no trees, and a sky without a sun or a moon?
A Map!!!!

What kind of pies do chairs eat?
Cherry pie!!!

Madiblu's picture
Madiblu January 17, 2012 - 2:57pm

why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? In case he got a hole in one!

Madiblu's picture
Madiblu January 17, 2012 - 2:46pm
lulu: heard you lost your cat. kiki: uhhu lulu: why dont you post an add inthe news? kiki: because my cat cant read.
Kiwi_FJ's picture
Kiwi_FJ December 15, 2011 - 11:39am

Waiter:what do you want today madam.

Madam:A Hot dog please.

Waiter:Sorry madam no dogs allowed.

Kiwi_CJ's picture
Kiwi_CJ December 14, 2011 - 3:44pm
hahaha!lol:)
Rachel Catherine's picture
Rachel Catherine December 7, 2011 - 4:43pm
This is my grandpa's all time favorite joke. So, there were two men who were ice fishing. One man was fishing to the right and fishing to the left but he wasn't catching anything. The other man seemed to be making no effort at all but he was catching a ton of fish. Finally the man who was catching no fish went over and ask the other man how he was catching so much fish. "Mbmnm" bumbled the man. "What?" said the other guy. The man spit out a handful of worms. "you've got to keep the worms warm!"
Armaan's picture
Armaan December 5, 2011 - 9:38pm
After having a disagreement, an married couple drove down a country lane without speaking to one another. They approached a pack of mules. "Relatives of yours?" said the wife, gesturing at the animals with a smile. "Yup," the man replied, "in-laws."
Deepa Gopal's picture
Deepa Gopal December 1, 2011 - 5:10pm

Youngzine's policy on Jokes

We love publishing your jokes; however there are a few guidelines to follow.

Jokes should be original or written by children in their own words; we do not accept a cut-n-paste from other websites. Jokes should also be appropriate for children, have proper language and not make fun of any group of people. Thanks! And Keep 'em coming!

greensalmon's picture
greensalmon November 23, 2011 - 6:43am
Just to let ya know this is more a riddle than a joke. There are 5 people trying to win the sign up to get the job. Only 3 people can win. The announcer comes out with the results. The 3 people who win are.....! me myself and i!! I think it's really funny!
greensalmon's picture
greensalmon November 21, 2011 - 6:21am

How do you make 7 even?

Answer: Take of the s!

Writerstime's picture
Writerstime December 3, 2011 - 4:54pm
That is funny!
Matthew14's picture
Matthew14 November 20, 2011 - 10:25am
A British plane was leaving for New York. The pilot and the co-pilot came on board wearing sunglasses, trying to look cool. An hour passed and the plane was over the Atlantic. The passengers looked down and noticed the plane was in a steady decline to the ocean! They started screaming!! In the cockpit, the co-pilot said to the pilot,"I'm glad they still scream so that we know where we are!"
Matthew14's picture
Matthew14 November 20, 2011 - 10:21am
A man walks into a bar... OUCH!
Kiwi_FJ's picture
Kiwi_FJ November 19, 2011 - 6:52pm
HAHAHA!LOL!!!
taytumm's picture
taytumm November 15, 2011 - 9:10am
what do you call a guy with fungi on his foot? a fun guy
greensalmon's picture
greensalmon November 23, 2011 - 6:45am
i like it too
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 6, 2011 - 1:27pm
Bob: what are the four seasons? Bill: salt, pepper, cinnamon, and sugar.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 6, 2011 - 1:25pm
What do snake librarians say to noisy kids? Sssss!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 6, 2011 - 1:23pm
Teacher: Count to ten. Little girl: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,10 Teacher: Why did you not say 9? Little girl: Because seven ate nine.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:47pm
what did the soothsayer say to the fruitcake? You have a sad but tasty future!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:45pm
What do you get when pregnant hens fight? They get scrambled eggs!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:43pm
What do swamp monsters like to eat when they go camping? Marsh-mallows.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:41pm
What did the frog say to the toad? Nothing, silly! Animals cannot talk!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:39pm
What's the capital of Washington ? W
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:39pm
Why did the astronomer's daughter like to knock drinks over? She wanted to see the Milky Way.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:37pm
What did Tennessee? What Arkansas.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:36pm
What did Delaware? A New Jersey!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:36pm
What part of a tree scares the cat? Bark!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 7:35pm
Knock, knock. Who is there? Ya. Ya who? Use Google; it's better!
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:56pm
why was everyone worried about the small bucket? It looked a little pail.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:55pm
why did the stoplight turn red? wouldn't you if you had to change in the middle of the street?
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:54pm
why did the kid throw quarters under the car wheel? He wanted to help change a tire.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:53pm
what did one wall say to the other? "meet you at the corner"
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:52pm
Why couldn't the tire quit his job? It was flat broke.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:52pm
what did one plate say to the other? "Dinner's on me"
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:51pm
why did the little girl bury her parents? She wanted to grow a family tree.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:49pm
A bully is picking on a boy's sister. The boy runs up and pushes the bully away and says"stop picking on my sister; thats my job"
adithin's picture
adithin April 15, 2014 - 9:47am
I don't get it
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:47pm
what do you get when you cross a mouth and a tornado? A tounge twister
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 5, 2011 - 3:45pm
what is black and white and green and white and black? To zebras fighting over a pickle.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 4, 2011 - 10:35am
what is the difference between a dog and a tree. they both have bark.
Writerstime's picture
Writerstime November 4, 2011 - 10:34am
what is a frogs favorite soda? Croak a cola
AmyHorowitz's picture
AmyHorowitz November 6, 2011 - 3:52pm
You need to comment on the classroom assignments...I am glad that you are reading other articles, but you must do the assignments that I have given.

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